"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
You know, you would really think that crying into a pair of denim shorts on the floor in Penney's would be the low point of my day. Definitely might have been the crazy point. But I'm actually kinda glad it happened, because it reminded me of something I've learned lately.
We all have times when we're down or out or just not, I don't know... where we want to be, I guess. Maybe we're not really sad, but we just have a lot of questions. Is today a good day? What's going to happen this school year? Am I beautiful enough, good enough, or just enough? Those can be really, really big questions. And when you look around, it's hard to tell what the right answer is. So sometimes it can be easy to look in the mirror, and use our body as the physical proof.
Whatever flaw it is you see - a size label too big, hair too curly, whatever - that can seem like the answer. Of course I'm not good enough - I've gained weight. I can see it right there in the mirror! Can't hide from that, right?
Maybe. Or maybe you're just not seeing it all. Because that quick glance is not the straight answer. How do I know? Well, I know this much - you never quite see yourself, like literally, physically, how you are. You are so much more beautiful than that one flaw. On top of that, questions like who you are or what the future holds just don't have easy answers like that. Even if you want to know right now if you are good enough or if everything will turn out alright, well you're just gonna have to wait. Wait, and try new things, and explore. That's how you figure things out.
So if you start taking the body-blaming road, take it easy. Because you deserve the chance to get a better answer. A real answer.
