"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
So you know I couldn't stop gushing about the book My Feet Aren't Ugly by Debra Beck. I want to tell you about another little exercise that I learned from the book. The instructions were plain and simple - make a list of the things you are afraid of. It's not something I think about that much. The first two were easy - worms and motorcycles. Silly, I know. But they are real enough to me. Then I started to think a little deeper - and realized I'm a bit of scaredy cat! I'm afraid of getting fat. I'm scared of being unattractive or unloved. And I'm scared I'll turn out to be a nobody. Maybe that's just me and I'm completely crazy. But I don't think so.
The funny thing is, what I'm afraid of is not really living a good life. Which is admirable enough. I love life, and I want to make the most of it. But by being afraid of these things, you hold yourself back. Having these fears doesn't stop anything from happening, and in fact, they can turn into something pretty ugly of their own. Eating disorders, for example, are based on fear - fear of gaining weight, fear of losing control. If you, like me, are too scared about being uncool or unpopular or whatever, then life won't really happen for you. And believe me, Fab Gals, life won't wait. Worrying does not slow down the process.
I probably won't ever get over my fear or worms or ride a motorcycle. That's okay with me. But slowly and surely, I'm going to release my fears - and for once, just live. I hope you don't let your fears hold you back either.
What things, big or small, are you afraid of? How has it affected you? Leave a comment to let me know (see the instructions on the left panel).
So, I've just started reading this totally fab book, My Feet Aren't Ugly by Debra Beck, and I just had to share a bit of it with you. It's "a girl's guide to loving herself from the inside out." At first I was a little skeptical, especially when one of the "Think it Over" sections said to make one list of all the things you like about yourself...and another list of the things you don't like. Why would I want to do that? I was sure I could make a laundry list of dislikes. But wait a minute, what do I like about myself again? Yikes.
As I got started though, it wasn't as bad as I imagined. The two lists turned out pretty even, full of both physical attributes and otherwise. Next, the book instructed to give your dislikes a good once-over: everything you don't like should be easy to change or accept. So I looked at both lists, and realized that all the things I did like were significant - my creativity, my crazy/spontaneous side, my eyes. And the things I didn't like were either things just waiting to be fixed - my braces, my hair- or just side effects of me not liking myself, like being too guarded and not being confident. As it turns out, there's no reason I shouldn't like myself at all.
The title is really funny to me, because not too long ago my feet would have been highly ranked on the "dislike" list. I inherited every bad foot gene possible, and I seriously hoped that I could get them fixed one day. But you know what? I can run, I can dance, and I can walk in high heels. So now I love my little ugly feet. Enough to share them with you...
So remember Fab Gals, whatever you don't like yourself can be easily fixed, might just be an insecurity, or can just be loved for what it is, like those ugly feet of mine. But that's just my story. What about you? Are your dislikes holding you back? What do you absolutely love about yourself? I encourage you to make your lists, and let me know what you discover!
xoxo
The Fab Gal
FG Update: Have you seen the map? We now have Fab Gals on almost every continent! Way to go - keep spreading the word!
