"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
People always talk about the "power of positive thinking," or how "seeing the world through rose-colored glasses" can change your life. I don't want to say that's not true, but... it just never seems that simple, and I never understood why.
Anyways, someone gave me this article about the ten errors of thinking, things like "mind reading" (assuming that someone thinks badly of you) or "all-or-nothing thinking" (everything is either totally perfect or a total flop). They're kind of like the roadblocks or brick walls to thinking clearly. Or maybe not blocks, but ways we tried to save ourselves - from getting disappointed, getting hurt. Or enjoying life more than we think we should.
And yesterday, I woke up with the feeling that nothing was going to go right. I had put off homework all week, and between dinner and other activities I wasn't sure I'd have time to finish and go to the movies. I was definitely being positive - positive I was going to mess things up. My day just continued on the same way. I worried about my friend not calling me back, and my outfit not being right. And homework. And boys. Everything. Life of a teenage girl, I know. But the worst part was that I kept telling myself I couldn't handle it.
Finally, I took a break, took a breath. And I looked in the mirror. And I realized, Hey, you look really beautiful today. I had been so frazzled that I didn't take the time to straighten my hair. It looked really cool, all wavy. I had never noticed that before. So that's the worst of it. I was so intent on assuming everything was wrong I missed the thing that had gone right.
That lead me to my personal FG challenge for the week - making note of the kinds of negative statements I make to myself that stop me from seeing the reality of things. Because life is messy and wavy and unpredictable. And that's beautiful.
