"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
This year, I've had an amazing opportunity to give advice to girls all over the country through one of my fave websites. It's kind of glamorous, like being an advice columnist, although I haven't been published in a magazine (at least, not yet anyway!). Me, working at warp speed to rescue girls from friend/boy/body/beauty crises, one by one. Okay, that's a bit of a stretch. I definitely don't have perfect answers to all the Q's I get, but I do the best I can. Still, being the go-to girl for problem solving has taught me that there is a big difference between giving advice, and being able to follow your own.
My life, although completely Fab, doesn't always feel that way. Even when things are going great, there's usually still something I want to fix. I probably worry too much. I often feel like the girls who write in - I've got a problem, and I would like to be given a clear road map for getting out of it. Thankfully, I've got a team of rescue workers myself for when I get stuck. But recently, one of them pointed out that maybe the trouble isn't that I don't know what to do, but that I don't follow the helpful advice I would give to someone else.
I think this happens to a lot of us FGs. If a sister, BFF, or cousin were in a tough sitch, we could see a simple solution to get her out of it. What's more, we would be supportive, and really believe that she could get through. But we often make ourselves the exception. Especially if we're feeling stressed or not very confident, we don't always treat ourselves as nicely as we would a friend in trouble. Being in the middle of it, and having our thoughts and emotions all over the place, can make it extra hard. Instead of advice and support, we might give ourselves extra stress and worry, or even beat ourselves up for having a problem in the first place. We may not mean to do it. But being negative or harsh doesn't solve any problems - usually, it just adds to them.
So next time you need some advice, try to think of what you would say to someone you really care about. Instead of being critical or mean, try to give yourself the support you would to a BFF. Even if you can't come up with all the answers right away, just trusting that you can handle any sitch is a great start. But hey, that's just my advice.
