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Friday, May 29, 2009 |
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Love Lessons From A Vampire |
Hello Fab Gals!
Now that summer is here, I've been indulging in some of my faves - shopping, laying in the sun, and of course, reading. My latest guilty pleasure: the Twilight series. If you've seen the movie, I promise, the books are even better (Edward Cullen is twice as gorgeous in my head). Anyways, not to give too much away, but I got to a high-drama point in the book: Bella comes to a crossroads, and even though she knows she made the right choice, she realizes her heart is really in two totally separate places. And it made me wonder, Is it possible that your heart never really lets go?
When I was little, I believed in The One. Mr. Right. A Prince Charming so perfect that he could make you forget every heartbreak, bad date, and all the crushes in-between. I thought you were given one true love, one soulmate. It might be possible. But the real world of dating, of love - it's all a little bit more complicated, I think. Sometimes we meet a few maybe-someday-Mr. Rights, and have to make some choices. Sometimes things just don't work out. And sometimes we do find Great Love, only to finish with a not-so-happy ending.
I so often hear people give advice to someone who has just gone through heartbreak like: "Time heals all wounds" or "You'll get over it soon enough" or even "Just forget him, already!" However, I've also learned that this advice is not only a bit of an extra burn, but it might not even be true at all. Maybe we never really have to "get over" someone, completely. Maybe there's no need to dump out every feeling we have for that person with their old sweatshirts and burned photographs. Maybe our hearts aren't made of limited-space-only. Maybe it's okay to leave that space, the memories, the love, and of course, the lessons, right where they are. Not erase it, but just see it for what it is. And maybe we can then trust once we get there, we'll know when we've found that one who deserves not only one place in our heart, but in our thoughts, our lives, and our hand.
xoxo
The Fab Gal Labels: boys, breakups, fab gal, relationships, Twilight |
posted by Fab Gal @ 3:11 PM |
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Friday, May 22, 2009 |
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Private Territory |
Hey FGs!
This is how absolutely confusing the diet/fashion world can be: I cracked open the new issue of Teen Vogue, and the Letter from the Editor was called "Heavy Stuff." It was talking about teen obesity, and said that "only about one percent of women in this country are anorexic. . . while obesity looms as perhaps our greatest national health crisis." So basically, she was saying that the real issue that needs to be worried about is teens being too big, not too small. Now, just on the very same page, one of the pictures showed two models described as "born beanpoles" skipping down the beach in swimsuits.
And I just don't think that you can say one of these weighty issues is more important than the other, or really even separate them out. Eating disorders can be harmful, and obesity can be a problem, too. But I think all of this crazy-focus, both on model bodies and on weight gain, can take things a little out of control. It's like we're on a national weight obsession, which can make managing your own changing body like walking through dynamite.
Your body is really your personal property. I think it is so hard to remember that when you turn on the TV or open a magazine, and all the body talk jumps out - Look at her! Eat this and be healthy! Be your best weight! - buy your body is absolutely and completely yours. Always remember that. At the end of the day, nobody can tell you how to look at it dress it, feed it or take care of it - it's all for you.
xoxo
The Fab GalLabels: body image, dieting, fab gal, media, teen magazines |
posted by Fab Gal @ 9:00 PM |
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Wednesday, May 20, 2009 |
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Put Down the Duck Tape, Back Away From the Cell Phone |
Hey Fab Gals! Being a teenager, you get faced with a lot of difficult communication situations. Speaking to someone in a language you're just learning - difficult. Winning an argument with your parents - pretty hard. But getting a boy to understand you? Ouch. I think we hav e a winner. It's so strange. Even though girls are getting more chances to play with the big boys, it seems like we still reign from completely different universes. T had broken up with her boyfriend. They left it open-ended, in that let's-be-friends-and-maybe-something-more-someday stage (dangerous territory, if you ask me). T tried to manage a friendly relationship, but her ex kept telling her that they shouldn't see each other at all. "What can I do?" she asked. "He's not listening to me!" She kept trying different ways of saying the same thing. And so did he. Things kept on a plane, but they both got more and more frustrated. Of course, as she pointed out, there were options. She could spend hours crafting the perfect novel of a text message to say exactly what would make him understand that she wanted to be with him. Or, she could get her guy friend to duck tape him to a tree, so she could scream at him till she had enough. Both would be extreme (obviously) - but probably not effective. See, I think of it like sunglasses. Everyone sees, or hears, things through their own filters. It's not just a boy-girl thing. I think that's what happens when people argue. We get so set on what we see or hear from someone that we don't exactly listen. Unfortunately, you can't force any boy (or any person) to see, hear, listen to, or understand you. At some point, it's probably best to just walk away. I promise, there's some Prince Charming out there dying to hang on your every word. xoxo
The Fab Gal Labels: advice, boys, communication, fab gal, relationships, teens |
posted by Fab Gal @ 9:32 PM |
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Monday, May 18, 2009 |
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Bikini Nightmares! |
Hey Fab Gals!
So, I was looking up and down the mirror. Okay, the crazy, wet hair I could deal with. And the pink cheeks. It was kind of cute, really. My arms even looked a little bit tanner. But oh dear, my stomach. Did I really show everyone that much of my stomach? What was I thinking, at a party like that? Maybe that new diet wasn't such a bad idea after all...
Summer is here, almost. And that so often means swimsuit shopping. I don't know wh at it is about that chore that sends girls into a frenzy. Maybe it's the lights, or the extra skin, or a trick of the mirrors. I really couldn't tell you. Whatever the cause, Dressing Room Syndrome can make even a pretty confident chick rag on her body.
There may be no know cure for this problem. But I think there are a few things you can do to make it a little bit better. First, take care of yourself. Not like going on a diet - by enjoying the sun, eating well, and relaxing. It just makes your whole body and self feel better. Also, look at the whole picture. It seems like a lot of girls have one specific body par they don't like. And you know what, that's fine if you can't change your opinion of your thighs or shoulders right now. But remember, other people don't fixate on that one part. They see the whole you - the combination of all the good parts (plus the one you don't like so much), and that whole beauty is what makes you, you.
Last, think about how you see your best friend. You probably think she looks great in her suit, and would never tear her down for going out in public donned in a bikini. For example, one of my best friends has a scar on her stomach that is pretty much only in sight when she goes swimming. I never even thought that it would bother her until she told me how she didn't like that she knew people noticed it. I always thought it was kind of cool, and just made her seem more beautiful and strong and cool. So what I'm saying is, realize that whatever it is you don't like, might just seem totally lovable by someone else.
It might be a crazy time of year, but that can be a good thing! So get out there and have some fab adventures.
xoxo
The Fab Gal Labels: body image, fab gal, self esteem, swimsuit shopping |
posted by Fab Gal @ 7:54 PM |
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Friday, May 15, 2009 |
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Confession Time |
Hello Fab Gals!
Okay, so I know I've been MIA for a while. Too long. Believe me, I definitely did not just forget about you all. Honestly, I just was starting to wonder if I really had anything good at all to say anymore.
I was starting to think that a year ago (just about when FG started!), that maybe then I knew what I was doing. Well, at least knew where I wanted to go. I'm not sure how true that was. But lately, it feels more like I'm walking around with a big question mark above my head. Questions, questions, questions. And unfortunately, no answers. I thought maybe, if I just stopped, the answers would just magically appear. Unfortunately, no luck there. And then I wondered, Who am I to give advice, when I can't seem to find answers anyway?
But you know what? That's me. That's my life. It may always be that way. Okay, I don't have the answers. But I'm willing to ask, and I'm willing to try. That's what matters. Most of all, I'm willing to help you, FG, in any way I can.
So, anyways, that means we will hopefully be back in action for the summer - keep your eye out for new updates in FG world! And, as always, you can reach me by comment, by Myspace, or by e-mail at fabgalsite@gmail.com.
xoxo
The Fab GalLabels: advice, fab gal, girls, teens |
posted by Fab Gal @ 12:12 PM |
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Monday, May 4, 2009 |
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Taking the Long Way |
Hey FGs!
It's almost the end of the school year, and summer will be here soon. And while that's usually an exciting thing, lately I can't help but feel... kinda disappointed. Not because I just love school that much, and don't want to leave. But because, well, this year just didn't quite go as I had hoped.
I think that when the year started out, I had big plans for how it would go. I imagined having oodles of cool friends, an amazingly cute boyfriend, lots of fun adventures, and being really, really happy. Being the most fabulous version of me yet. But somewhere very quickly, those dreams became just that. Dreams. The "cool" people turned out to not be a match at all, and the crazy party scene was not my taste. And I just didn't feel as confident or as happy as I hoped. Suddenly, it felt more like I had really failed. And what are you supposed to do when the "you" you were going to be just doesn't happen to be there?
Looking back, I realize maybe I would've been, could've been, okay. Or maybe, I was really okay all along. Because maybe I did start down the wrong path. But I had good intentions. Maybe losing your direction is all part of the process of getting where you need to be. Besides, is that really how it's supposed to go? Trying to be the one everyone likes? Having rules for who you "have" to be? No. I mean, wanting people to like you is totally normal. And having dreams is no bad thing, either. But at the end of the day, I'd rather be happy, and know that I am a good person that I can like. So maybe the detour was worth it after all.
How about you, FG? What lessons did you learn this year? Where did your travels take you? I would love to hear.
xoxo
The Fab GalLabels: advice, fab gal, girls, life lessons, self esteem, teens |
posted by Fab Gal @ 11:26 AM |
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