| |
| |
Monday, July 27, 2009 |
|
 |
|
 |
| |
| I'm Wanna Be Pop-u-lar |
Hey FGs!
I just finished a fabulous book, How to Be Popular, by Meg Cabot (my fave author!). Basically, it was about a girl named Steph, who had always been on the outside (along with her BFFs). Then she finds a book on, you guessed it, how to be popular. Suddenly, she's got an in with the A-crowd. She has everything she ever wanted... until she realizes that maybe it's not what she wanted at all.
Is it so bad to want to be popular? It's not bad to want people to like us, right? I do know for sure there was a time when I would have done anything for a book like the one Steph finds. You know, if it would really work out like that. It's not like I didn't like the friends I had. I just thought my life would be that much better if I was the girl that everyone loved, that everyone wanted to be friends with.
Popularity is a tricky thing. Sometimes it seems like, "Oh, if I just had the right outfit/got invited to the right party/say the right thing, then I will be popular." Maybe it's like that. Or maybe it's just luck. But whatever way you get it, it can go away just as fast. And sometimes, the thing you think will make you happy, was not what you imagined at all. What is really worthwhile is finding those friends that actually will be there for you, no matter what. Whether they are popular or not, it doesn't really matter. But finding people you love to be with, that's what's really gonna make you smile.
A new school year is coming quick. And maybe this year can be your year. No, not your year to be the most popular chica in school. But the year to try new things, make real friends, and figure out you. I can't guarantee everyone will love you, but if you can stop worrying about everyone else, you will definitely love you. For sure.
xoxo
The Fab GalLabels: advice, fab gal, friendships, popularity, relationships, teens |
posted by Fab Gal @ 5:14 PM   |
|
|
|
|
 |
|
 |
| |
Friday, July 17, 2009 |
|
|
|
|
| |
| Are We There Yet? |
Hey FGs!
The bags are packed, the car is running - family vacation time. Oh, boy. As much as you love the fam, sometimes the idea of spending days away with them can be overwhelming, to say the least. But no stress. You can definitely survive... and maybe even have a little fun.
- Don't Forget.... Shoes, check. Swimsuit, check. You've got the basics, but make sure when you're packing in to throw in a few personal comforts, whether it's a new book you just started, your fave CD, or a special blanket. It will help you relax if you're feeling a little stressed out.
- Ask and You Will Receive... Hitting your limits on family time? See if you can (nicely) negotiate a little beach time or moment in the hotel to be by yourself. Having a little alone time to recharge might just be what you need. Sometimes you just need to speak up.
- Look Ahead... You want me to go where?? Not digging the place your rents picked? So maybe you are more of a city girl, and they've planned a trip in the good 'ol outdoors. See if you can do a little research about your vacay spot before you leave. Find out what kind of stuff they've got that you would enjoy to do there. You might find out they have something you, and your family, can all have a good time doing.
- Wish You Were Here... So your parents aren't letting you bring your cell phone, let alone your whole crew. Yep, you're gonna miss them. Make some time to grab some postcards to send to your girls, or get some silly pics you know your BFF would love. It might not be the same without them, but at least you'll have something to share when you get back.
And most importantly... - Laugh! Chances are mom or dad, or maybe one of your li'l sibs will embarrass you at some point during the trip. No, actually not chances. They most definitely will. There is nothing in your powers to stop them. You might as well laugh, and enjoy the little comedy crew you call your family.
Are you going on vacation, FG? How do you make it rock? Let me know the scoop, either here or at Twitter or Myspace. Wishing you super summer vacays, whether you're heading out or staying home! xoxo The Fab Gal Labels: advice, fab gal, family, fun ideas, girls, teens, vacation |
| posted by Fab Gal @ 7:35 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
Saturday, July 11, 2009 |
|
|
|
|
| |
| Invasion of the Body Blamer |
Hey FGs!
You know, you would really think that crying into a pair of denim shorts on the floor in Penney's would be the low point of my day. Definitely might have been the crazy point. But I'm actually kinda glad it happened, because it reminded me of something I've learned lately.
We all have times when we're down or out or just not, I don't know... where we want to be, I guess. Maybe we're not really sad, but we just have a lot of questions. Is today a good day? What's going to happen this school year? Am I beautiful enough, good enough, or just enough? Those can be really, really big questions. And when you look around, it's hard to tell what the right answer is. So sometimes it can be easy to look in the mirror, and use our body as the physical proof.
Whatever flaw it is you see - a size label too big, hair too curly, whatever - that can seem like the answer. Of course I'm not good enough - I've gained weight. I can see it right there in the mirror! Can't hide from that, right?
Maybe. Or maybe you're just not seeing it all. Because that quick glance is not the straight answer. How do I know? Well, I know this much - you never quite see yourself, like literally, physically, how you are. You are so much more beautiful than that one flaw. On top of that, questions like who you are or what the future holds just don't have easy answers like that. Even if you want to know right now if you are good enough or if everything will turn out alright, well you're just gonna have to wait. Wait, and try new things, and explore. That's how you figure things out.
So if you start taking the body-blaming road, take it easy. Because you deserve the chance to get a better answer. A real answer.
xoxo
The Fab GalLabels: advice, body image, fab gal, girls, life lessons, self esteem, teens |
| posted by Fab Gal @ 6:42 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
Monday, July 6, 2009 |
|
|
|
|
| |
| Mean Girls Isn't Just a Movie on TV |
Hello FGs! When you're in a sitch with a bully or a whole crew of Mean Girls, it's hard to know what to do or how to react. You might think about fighting back, winning 'em over, or running for the hills. But the best thing to do? Keep a cool head, as best as you can, and follow these FG rules: - Know Your True Friends - Not everyone will be a good friend to you. That's just reality. A real friend wouldn't make fun of your looks, spread rumors about you, make plans and purposely disinvite you, or do anything to hurt you on purpose. It's better to just let them go. Even if you know of just one real BFF, it's better than having a whole crew of people who don't really have your back.
- Speak Up - If you're dealing with lotsa negativity on a daily basis, let somebody know what you're going through. You don't need to feel like a "tattle." But just finding someone outside of all the drama - an older sib, mom, a teacher - will at least give you someone to vent to, and you'll know you're not alone. They may even have some good ideas for how to deal.
- Don't Bite Back - It doesn't matter who started it. It doesn't matter if she's just pure evil behind blonde hair and a Juicy Couture tracksuit. It's so not worth damaging your own rep. Fight fire with fire, and you're gonna get hurt.
- Keep Your Chin Up - Demi had her acting, and Taylor had songwriting. Finding something you like to do as a healthy way to let out your emotions and lift your spirits will help you stay strong. Being picked can make you feel really icky, and in the moment of it, you feel like there must be something wrong with you. There's not. Don't let them bring you down. You are good enough.
- Say "I'm Sorry" - If you have been gossiping or teasing, think about if you've maybe taken it a little too far. It may be having a bigger impact on people than you think. It doesn't mean you're a horrible, terrible person. You are in control of how you treat people, and you have the ability to turn things around.
xoxo The Fab Gal Labels: advice, bullying, fab gal, friends, relationships |
| posted by Fab Gal @ 9:28 AM |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
Wednesday, July 1, 2009 |
|
|
|
|
| |
| Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Bully? |
I'm back, Fab Gals! When someone says "bully," it makes you picture some dude big biceps, standing in the corner of the playground, ready to pummel the little guys for their pudding. But here in the real girl world, bullies are a little harder to identify from the outside. That's what you see in the cartoons, anyway. However, they do exist, and even without major muscle power, they can cause some serious damage. Bullying can mean physical harm, like pushing or punching, but it can also look a little differently. Spreading rumors, kicking someone  out of the group, nasty text messages. The worst part is that it doesn't often people think it's "normal" teen behavior. In fact, the girls getting picked on usually blame themselves. They become sure that it was their fault, that maybe if they were prettier/cooler/smarter/more perfect, this wouldn't be happening to them. Would you believe that Demi Lovato was bullied? It's true. In fact, it went all the way from teasing to a nasty "We hate Demi" campaign by kids at her school. Like a lot of girls in that sitch, she began to blame herself. "Everyone was saying it's jealously, and blah, blah," Demi said. "The worst part is, I didn't believe it because I didn't think I was worthy of someone being jealous of me. Looking back, that must have been it. But I always pinned it on myself and said there must have been something I did wrong."
This kind of girl bullying can be common, and it can take many forms. It can also be way damaging. It can make you feel worthless, and really stick with you a long time. But let me tell you a little story about a girl named Taylor. At school, she was ditched by her  crew, who went on to teasing her and her love of country music. She was absolutely miserable. But one day, miss Taylor Swift became a star. At one of her concerts, those former friends "showed up, wearing my T-shirts and asking me to sign their CDs. It was bittersweet, because it made me realize that they didn't remember being mean to me and that I needed to forget about it, too." When you're in the moment of it, bullying can really get under your skin and make you question yourself. It can feel like the end of your world. But it's so not. That's why I love T & D's stories, because it's absolute proof that this isn't the end. Not for you.
So let's call this the FG Anti-Bullying week. Or maybe Pro-Friend week? Because, whether you've been a victim or even a bully yourself, we can get past it. xoxo
The Fab Gal
Labels: advice, bullying, fab gal, friends, girls, relationships, teens |
| posted by Fab Gal @ 12:54 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
