"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe
There are certain characters that show up again and again in the movies and on TV. The mean-but-popular cheerleader. The nerdy-sweet sidekick. Some of them are totally fake and just for entertainment (In fact, most cheerleaders are actually quite… cheerful).
But then sometimes…. Well, art imitates life. You know that girl who’s so obviously with the wrong guy, but she keeps going back to him again and again? The classic off-and-on relationship – like Ross and Rachel, except with a bad boy. Well to be honest, I always thought that girl was kind of dumb. Or crazy. I mean really, do you think anything is going to happen differently this time? No. How many times do you have to hit your head against the wall… to see it always going to hurt you?
But there’s nothing like life lessons to teach you not to judge. Because I have been That Girl.
I don’t need to get into the details of it. Boy likes girl. Girl gives him a chance. Boy decides he’s done, and girl gets her heart broken. Then the cycle repeats.
I don’t know. I just liked him so much, you know? It seemed worth the risk. But really I didn’t think about the risk at all. Love (or even just the possibility of it) makes you remember hope and forget logic. With the right person it’s lovely, but with the wrong one, it can be toxic.
But what I want you to know is, if a relationship is not working out like you imagined, and you’re just getting hurt, don’t settle. I know, I know… it’s not that easy. Boy, do I ever know. Because it doesn’t feel like settling. And at first, when you’re letting go of that back-and-forth fella, it’s going to hurt you. Way more than it hurts him. But you have to let all of it go – the memories, the feelings, and that piece of you that’s always with him. You’ll never be able to find the right person, and let them in, if you’re saving a seat for the wrong person. Eventually, you have to kiss Mr. Wrong goodbye and let the credits roll. I finally decided to do that.
Of course, if this was a movie, Mr. Right would have shown up 5 minutes and a sad song after I made the right decision. And we would kiss on my doorstep, preferably in the pouring rain. But in real life, happy endings aren’t so immediate. I still believe I made the right decision though.
Because I’ve been That Girl. And I’m so done. That chapter is closed, the scene is cut. Moving on. I think I’ll go back to being the hopeless romantic, Cinderella-waiting-for-Prince-Charming I’ve always been.
I believe there’s someone wonderful out there for me and for you.
And besides, I just can’t resist a good glass slipper.
This weekend I was walking through the kitchen and caught the end of a story on CBS Sunday Morning. I instantly knew I wanted to share it with you. The feature was about Angela Zhang, a 17-year-old from California who wrote a research report describing her original recipe. And what does it make? A potential cure for cancer! It will take years to know if it works for humans, but the pros say it's promising... so much so that Angela won the Siemens Competition in Math, Science & Technology.
And what's one thing she used her $100,000 prize for? Shoes... including an absolutely adorbs pair of Steve Madden embellished purple flats. A girl after my own heart. Check out the full story here:
Amazing, right? It's so inspiring to see FGs following their passion and making a difference in the world. Way to go, Angela!
xoxo
The Fab Gal
PS - Do you know a Fab Gal with an impressive story? Leave a comment to let me know - her story could be featured here!
Whether you're a single lady or happily Facebook-official with someone, it's good to know in your mind what real, true love looks - or sounds! - like to you. I think I found something that does that for me. One of my BFLs (that's Bestie for Life) shared a video with me by the poet Rudy Francisco. He has a few super-sweet poems, but this one, called "The First Time You Said Hello," absolutely melts my heart.
As V-Day approaches, remember to look for (and create!) the kind of relationship you deserve. What I wish for you is that you find someone who adores you for you and wants to be part of your life through the good and the bad... because I know you would do that much and more for them.
xoxo
The Fab Gal
What's something that epitomizes your idea of love? A song, a movie, a picture, a real couple you know? Share in the comments below!
2012 is still brand new, so it’s that time when everyone is hopeful – making resolutions and looking forward to the possibilities of the New Year. It’s also that time for me (and maybe you!) when graduation is just a few months away. Sure, graduation is an ending, and reflecting about all that’s changed since you stepped through those school doors for the first time. But even more, graduation is about making big decisions for the future. What do you want to do with your life? Where will you go to college? Or maybe, who do you wanna be when you step into the halls of middle school? The questions and uncertainty are enough to make the future seem a little frightening.
When the future seems frightening, it’s easy to just push it away, focus on the now, ignore the what-ifs, and play it safe. That's what I've been doing, anyway. But of course, that’s not really dealing. No matter what you do (or don’t do) the future is always coming, one minute at a time. Thankfully for me, I have someone who always puts things in perspective. My dad reminded me that what matters most is thinking not just about the right now, but where you want to be in the future – whether that’s 1 year, 4 years, or 10 years. Because c’mon, you have big dreams, right? But the only way to get there is by pulling them out of the clouds and starting to work towards them right now, not some day in the future once this or that happens. I don’t want you or me to sell ourselves and our Fab-ness short by squishing down life into what fits in the present.
So I’m starting to make goals for the new year… including a few I hope to share with you. But what are your hopes, FG? How are you moving forward in 2012? Share in the comments below… and know I’m cheering you on every step of the way.
